Delete...

No matter how many times you may hit the Delete button, I still exist.......

Drowning In You....

Drowning In You
by Gretchen Peters

you blow in harder than a hurricane
i’m always standing in the pouring rain
sometimes it’s all that i can do
to keep from drowning in you


you come on softer than a summer wind
love me til i’m weak and then you’re gone again
and i ain’t got no anchor to hold on to
to keep from drowning in you


bridge: you always pull me under
while i’m trying to stay afloat
you bring the rain and thunder
i bring the boat


i used to come running when you’d cry for help
but this time around baby i gotta save myself
gotta keep my head above the blue
gotta keep from drowning in you

sometimes it’s all that i can do
to keep from drowning in you


©2002 sony/atv tunes, purple crayon music

Life Lesson - Via E-mail....

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well.

The animal cried piteously for hours

as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.

Finally, he decided the animal was old,

and the well needed to be covered up anyway;

it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over to help him.

They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well.

At first, the Donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly.

Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well.

He was astonished at what he saw.

With each shovel of dirt that hit his back,

the donkey was doing something amazing.

He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal,

he would shake it off and take a step up.

Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt.

The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up.

Each of our troubles is a steppingstone.

We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up!

Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.

Live simply and appreciate what you have.

Give more - Expect less.......

NOW ............ Enough of that crap!

The donkey later came back, and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him.

The gash from the bite got infected and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you do something wrong,

and try to cover your ass,

it always comes back to bite you!

This Month's Life Lessons.....

What I learned this month............

• I'm allmost 43 years old and am just now begining to figure out what makes a man and what doesn't......
• Honesty and integrity are not traits we are born with, and alot of people never obtain those qualities, yet preach about them daily......
• "I'm sorry" doesn't make everything better. The older I get the more I've come to realize it's just another word and it doesn't fix anything or make the hurt go away......
• Karma is a powerful thing. What comes around, goes around. Sometimes it just takes longer to get to those that that warrant it's total effect......
• To thrive people must grow and change. Sometimes we have to let go of the things we thought we loved in order for this to happen. Once we allow that to happen we can step back and see things more objectively......
• If consumed in excess, Tuaca doesn't always make everything seem so much clearer.....
• If consumed in excess, Tuaca can make some things seem a lot better then it really was...
• I'm too old for hangovers....
• My inner voice won't fail me if I don't fail it.....
• The older I get, the better life gets.....
• My most important job is to raise my two boys to be strong, smart men with character and integrity, to replace those on this earth lacking such characteristics....
• Children put all life's chaos into perspective....

Keep Breathing.......

Keep Breathing

Ingrid Michaelson

The storm is coming but I don't mind.
People are dying, I close my blinds.
All that i know is I'm breathing now.
I want to change the world...instead I sleep.
I want to believe in more than you and me.

But all that I know is I'm breathing.
All I can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing now.
All that I know is I'm breathing.

All I can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing now.

All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing.
All we can do is keep breathing now.

My Blog Style....

You know, every now and then I get a comment about not posting enough. When I first started this blog it was for various reasons (looking back now, perhaps all the wrong reasons). Someone who I thought was close to me, introduced me to the blog world and I dived in head first. That was a few years ago. When I started this blog I'm not even totally sure what my intention was other then to try something new and oh, so techy and edgy. But facts are, I'm neither of those.....

I have now come full circle and write this blog for me and no one else. There are only a couple of people in my everyday life who even know I have one. I don't make posts advertising peoples products, pictures in magazines, there is no randomness in this blog, it's all personal not just random words on a page to fill a daily quota. I guarantee no certain number of posts a day, I promise no topics. My posts are purely from my heart, put to words when it seems I can no longer hold it inside of me. I make no apologies.... I speak from my heart...

I've known many people in my life who have a wide range of interests, and are committed to none. Their attention span is limited, they easily become bored with the effort, lose the vision and move on to the next "new" thing to temporarily conquer. I am not one of those people. I am methodical, dedicated and committed, at my own speed. While I may not write often, I enjoy it and will not quit.

I do love receiving random comments and having continuous hits to my blog, and I hope they continue.............

Quote of the Day........

There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, "Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've got dreams." Then they put the box away and bring it out once in awhile to look in it, and yep, they're still there. Erma Bombeck

I Hate You......

I hate that I am using that word. I do not allow my children to use it, and yet it flows from my lips with such bitterness, it burns. I know the word hate carries so much negativity and conceptions of bigotry. But as I sit here at this midnight hour searching for a word to express what I am feeling, I am at a loss for any other word that best describes my feelings towards you....

I have run across many people in my past, as well as my present that I find there actions, their words, their beliefs, distasteful and at times nauseating. But most of them never consume my thoughts, my dreams as you. You, in your anonymity, in your little world, in the life you live outside my own, yet forever intertwined in mine.

I do not care what your excuse is. I do not care how your memory has distorted the truth as it was, or how you perceive it to be. I do not care about your age, or who you think is to blame.

In one breath, in one action, you conceived my little boy with your sperm and egg. And yet, less then six weeks later, you cracked his skull, bruised his body and forever altered his life. And here I sit, almost seven years later, tears spilling over, trying so hard to put back the pieces of this little soul you damaged. Hate, just doesn't seem to be enough...........

This week I will take my precious angel to the doctor again, they will scan his head, test is skills, draw his blood, and make him cry. He will look at me with those bright blue eyes. He will search my face as if to ask "why?" "Why, did I bring him there? Why am I allowing them to do these things to him? Why aren't I protecting him?" I hate you.......

I hate what you did to him. I hate that you could move on in your life, and he is frozen in time, in his skills, in his learning, in achieving his fullest potential.

And yet with your carelessness, your abuse, your neglect; I was blessed with a soul to care for, a soul to love, a soul to nurture.....

I will strive all my life to help him overcome the obstacles he will face. I will be his advocater, his voice, his support system. I will believe in his potential when everyone else has given up. I will teach him to be a better person then you are. I will teach him that anger can be conquered. He will not grow to be the poster child of his past. He will know love, he will learn patience, he will not repeat history. And like me, he will learn forgiveness.....